If you have a child experiencing feelings of sadness, loneliness, or depression, you may feel at a loss as to what to do to help them. Of course, the first thing you will do is bring them to their healthcare provider and follow whatever treatment plan they provide, but is there more you could be doing? As a matter of fact, there is. Making sure your child has a healthy eating schedule, is participating in physical activity each day, and is getting the recommended amount of sleep each night is essential.
If you and your child already have a mindfulness practice you’re familiar with, they understand how to detach themselves from their thoughts. This can help when their thoughts turn against them, such as when they have thoughts like, “you’re worthless.”
With mindfulness techniques, your child can change the thought, “I am worthless,” to the observation, “I am having a thought that I am worthless.” This bit of distance from the thought can help them let go of judgment, criticism, and ruminations about the past. They can also more easily share their thoughts with you or another trusted adult. It is not easy to share the “fact” that they are worthless with someone, but much easier to share the fact that they are having a thought that is telling them they are worthless. They are more open, then, to discussing the falseness of this thought.
Depression is often very isolating, making your child feel like they are alone in the world and unlike others. They feel ashamed of this difference and want to stay away from others for fear of their seeing the truth.
Practicing self-kindness mindfulness can help your child recognize their common humanity with others and help them not to over-identify with their perceived flaws. For example, they can focus on phrases such as:
Another practice to help them connect with others is to observe other people, whether they know them or not, and remind themselves:
Practicing self-compassion and recognizing their common humanity are ways for children to get away from the thoughts that are trying to take them down a spiral of negativity. In addition to these mindful practices, they can always ask for help from trusted friends and adults who understand what they are going through.
Again, the first plan of treatment for children with depression is whatever their doctor or therapist prescribes. That may very well include mindfulness practices, but if it doesn’t, you can add mindfulness to your child’s treatment at home. Being aware that what their brain is trying to tell them is a lie and reminding themselves of basic truths are mindful ways to attack depression at its source.